Lillian Ethel Pagano's Obituary
When I think of my dear sweet Mom, a woman of grace, there are soo many memories and qualities of her likeness that come to mind. First, I would like to tell you a little about her life. Mom was born in Hartford, Connecticut in 1930 to Thomas and Louvenah Howarth. She spoke fondly of her memories of her childhood that included fishing with her dad, getting ice cream with her mom and frequent visits to the beach with her family. As she grew older, she attended Beaver College to earn her degree and along the way made many friends whom she kept until her late age. She was always a good friend, full of light and care towards others and showed that in how she treated them. She really loved from her heart and was not afraid to show it. She met my dad, Raymond, at 19 during her college times and they were married two years later in 1951. My mom had many aspirations which she achieved and was a very smart lady. She graduated Beaver College in 1952 earning her Bachelor’s of Science degree and went on to teach grades 3rd and 4th for several years until she had Frank and I. She was always teaching at home too, not only with homework, but with life lessons as well. Even as I grew older and on my own, she would try to help by giving advice (even if I did not want to hear it) I always knew it was out of love. Mom had faced many trials and daily challenges in life. At this time in her life, it was her diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis at the age of 60. Despite this, she decided to go back to college to further her education in teaching. When she was 65, she graduated with her Master’s degree with an emphasis on reading. While she enjoyed many authors, she really enjoyed the heartfelt writings of Tomie dePaula and imaginatively fun nature of Shel Silverstein. She shared these writings with many children in the family and always instilled the importance of education and God’s word. Mom was a lady of God and would volunteer her time at the church of Our Lady of Grace and would pray for others on a regular basis. She knew many verses by heart and would recite them from memory even in her older age. First and foremost being the Lord’s Prayer. She loved to travel and even worked at a travel agency for a little while. She ventured China and Australia during this time. After my dad had passed she made a point for us all to spend time together and travel as a family. My brother’s family, mine and she would venture to many amazing places all over the world where we had unforgettable memories and experiences shared. As her MS progressed things became harder for her, she lost her son and even through these awful trials, she remained very strong and positive through the hardest of times. My Mom had a talent/skill of making the people around her feel loved and special, and she always wanted to make things better. People may describe my mom as poised endearing and caring. I know these things and so many more of her; she was a ray of light with her smile and heart she carried with her, a friend you could always rely on, a mom who loved with all she had, and a grandma who treated her grandchildren more like her own children. Comical times with my mom and brother growing up are where Frank and I would be fighting in the backseat of the car, she would reach her hand behind and swat at us to get us to stop and Frank and I would stand up in the back of the car so she could not reach us. Another funny thing is she would get our names mixed up when calling us to her saying, “Fr-Barb” and him “Ba-Frank.” Little things I will never forget about my mom are how she would always curse her left foot, sing songs of “You are My Sunshine” and Alice in the Bathtub going blub blub, her love of laughing and how when we would leave, she would say, “Bubbye for now, not for good, just for now”. When she was happy she would smile, give herself a big hug, and at the same time make a Hug noise like, “Ooo!” When she saw her family members, she lit up and had so much love in her eyes she would even tear up. There are many things I have learned, appreciated and applied to my life from being around the wonderful person my mom was. She emulated what a great mother/daughter relationship was and what love is. Due to this, I, too, place a big importance on being an involved grandmother to my two grandboys and having a close friendship with my own daughter. I have always admired and appreciated my mom for being such a genuine, honest, loving, beautiful lady, inside and out. She never really had a bad word to say about anyone and was a true believer in God. She practiced her faith daily by the things she did and spoke. My Mom was a wonderful mother, and you knew she loved you because she not only said it, but she showed it. Because my mom had such a hard struggle at the end, I hope she knows how much I truly loved her. I always tried to help and honor her wishes as I had promised to and make her as happy as possible even in the face of her conditions. I love you Mom, and I will just say, Bubbye for now, not for good, just for now!
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