Carolina
My beautiful mother? gentle but direct. She was a caring understanding, and forgiving mother. My heart aches because I miss her so much. She was a part of my everyday life. We spoke almost every day. I ask myself daily about moving forward after this devastating loss, the toll it will take on me and the tears I will continue to cry? How strong was my mom? Strong until the end. You knew from her grip and her stamina to continue to fight against the deterioration of Parkinson's Disease. My mom didn?t like to give up; she devoted her life and her entire being into raising us kids, and providing for not only for us, but her family too. She always had an extra room or bed in her home and food for whomever needed it. Both my mom and dad were compassionate and caring like that. There are really no words to describe the closeness I had with my mother. I know this because the slow, agonizing decline of her Parkinson's Disease was taking a toll on her, but I continued to be optimistic and hopeful that she would overcome it all. I don?t think anyone is really prepared to plan for this day when you lose a loved one. And as such, you start thinking about what you might say. After unsuccessfully trying to put it into words to paper, I realized that there really are no words to describe this grief, sadness and emptiness I have. But there are feelings, indescribable feelings. Feelings that make my heart ache and my whole being melt. Because my mother was my insides and will continue to be my insides. My confidence. My bravery . My strength. My sensitivity. My compassion, My Loyalty. My Anger. My Impatience, My Intelligence. My laughter. And even my Smart Aleck attitude. Mom you will always be my everything! I miss you, Mom. I will trust myself, Mom, and I hope to be fine someday. But know one thing?. I love you always and forever?? I want to personally thank all of who were a part of my mother?s life, and each of you who had a part if not helping with us with her care, you also listened and were a sounding board when I felt helpless. Especially my husband Douglas who always had my back. I will always be grateful to you all for all your support and compassion in my caregiving journey. Maria, you were the best Mom I could have ever asked for…. Rest Mom. Be with Dad and Enrique. I will miss you immensely. Your loving Daughter, Carolina Espinosa de los Monteros