Diane Marie Sutton's Obituary
Our precious, beloved mother, Diane Sutton (80), passed away on March 6th, 2022, after living valiantly with Lewy Body Dementia for twelve years. Diane was born in Los Angeles on September 14th, 1941, to parents Betty and William Cooney, and was raised in the San Francisco Bay Area by her mother and stepfather, Fred Sutton. She and her younger brother, Rick Sutton, were very close throughout their childhood, getting up to all kinds of hijinks in the neighborhood and nearby farms. Growing up, Diane studied piano with her grandmother, and, at San Jose State University, she discovered her passion for operatic performance. She worked her way through college by singing for local synagogues and churches and teaching piano lessons. After earning her BA in music, she landed a job as a TWA flight attendant in the mid-1960s, serving in the first-class cabin on the New York to Milan flights, as she spoke fluent Italian. She served many famous people on her flights, including Pope Paul VI on the first ever papal visit to the US and Johnny Carson, on whom she spilt not one but two trays of ice water (she said he was very gracious about it!). During this time, Diane married recent US Naval Academy graduate (’65) Joseph Croteau, who soon left to serve two tours of duty as a pilot in the Vietnam War. When he returned, Diane left TWA, began teaching music in public schools in Fresno, California, and had their first child, Melissa, in November of 1970. Diane adored animals, especially cats, and their trusty tabby, Ben, was a constant companion through this time. A year later, the Navy moved the family to San Diego, and their second child, Kristin, was born in December of 1972. She became a Christian and committed her life to God during these early years in San Diego.
Four years on, the family moved to Oak Harbor, Washington, the remarkable beauty of which Diane loved. When Diane and Joe divorced, Diane moved with her young daughters back to San Diego, raising them in the community of Imperial Beach and spending much time with them on the seaside. She married Bill Torres in 1980 and embraced his four grown children as her own, loving our now large Latinx blended family. She also went back to school, got certified as a Spanish teacher, and started teaching again.
During this time, Diane filled our house with music of all kinds, everything from popular tunes to opera to classic hymns. She played guitar and piano and took us to musicals and the symphony. She was a playful spirit with a keen sense of humor; she knew how to have fun and bring joy to people, whether with her family and friends or in the classroom. Diane also was highly intelligent and insatiably curious about places and people all over the globe. She brought her voluminous knowledge of history and culture as well as current affairs around the world to our dinner table every night, planting in her daughters an intense curiosity about and respect for the experiences, cultures, and beliefs of others. Diane encouraged Melissa and Kristi to travel the world, as she had done, and learn to understand and appreciate people and places far beyond our own backyard, a lesson they both took to heart. Diane also was a true spiritual thinker and leader; her gifts as a prayer warrior were extraordinary, and she supported people in prayer whenever she learned of others’ struggles.
In 1990, with both of her daughters in college, she landed a job at California High School in Whittier and moved to Brea in Orange County. She was a dedicated teacher of Spanish and French there for over a decade. Other teachers sent their most difficult students to Diane’s classes because she was so great with even the toughest teens. Her compassion, kindness, grace, and humor won them over; she genuinely cared for and about her students.
A few years after Diane retired from teaching, she moved back down to San Diego to be closer to Melissa, who was teaching at colleges there. Diane had been having some health concerns, the first signs of what we would discover, nearly a decade later, was Lewy Body Dementia. She enjoyed her years in San Diego, but eventually moved to England for the birth of her grandchild, Druhan, in 2006. In 2007, she moved back to San Jose to live with her father, Fred, but her condition worsened, and by the end of 2009, she was hospitalized for severe symptoms of dementia. Diane was moved back down to San Diego so she would be close to Melissa, who began managing her care. We were very fortunate that Diane was correctly diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia in April of 2010, as she could be treated effectively by the right specialists early on in her journey with the disease.
Diane was a fighter, and she tackled her disease with prayer and defiant strength. We were going to make sure she had the care she needed but also the freedom to enjoy all that she could while she still was able. People with Lewy Body Dementia generally live 5 – 7 years after diagnosis. Diane lived for twelve years. She said many times that she wanted to be here for Melissa and Kristi, she did not want to leave us. In 2014, Kristi moved back to San Diego from England to be near her mother. While Diane was in Balboa Nursing and Rehab Center for eight years, we (her daughters) visited her as many times per week as we could, and we got to know the wonderful caregivers who provided her not only with physical help but also with invaluable love and kindness. They encouraged her to sing, which she loved, and they gave her the tasty snacks her daughters left for her. Diane loved a great snack! Pinkberry’s frozen yogurt with chocolate and fruit toppings, See’s Candy, cookies, she took real pleasure in these things until very recently. Before the COVID-19 pandemic, Melissa and Kristi took Diane out to dinner often and to the opera once a year. Diane sometimes sang along with the opera in Italian, even when she could not open her eyes. The things that filled Diane with joy continued to do so to the end of her life. At the very end, Kristi and Melissa played her favorite music for her and sang the songs Diane had sung to them as children.
Diane had a powerful, beautiful spirit that could be felt even when she was far along in her dementia journey and could speak little. Her extraordinary strength, compassion, generosity, and faith made her a blessing to innumerable people who have flowed through her life, her family, her friends, her students. She transformed this world for the better.
Diane is survived by her daughters, Melissa and Kristi, and her grandson Druhan. Diane’s memorial service will take place on Thursday, March 31st, at 12:30pm, at Greenwood Memorial Park in San Diego.
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